❋ memory 010.

[notsuperman]

Memory regained: Trivial Neutral - being silly in the elevator (ATMs and crackers, oldies but not goodies, what a punderful world, box maze) (escape: elevator)
Date: Day 79
Game won: Anagram's game

Memory:

[ investigate the strange machine ]



PHI: Is it an ATM?
SIGMA: Hmm. I see.
SIGMA: Then do you think the safe down here is stuffed with cash?
PHI: That would be nice.
SIGMA: No it wouldn’t! We have bigger problems than money right now!
SIGMA: Like, I donno, getting the hell out of here!
PHI: Well, you don't have to yell about it.

[ investigate the strange machine again ]

SIGMA: There’s nothing on this screen.
PHI: Yeah. Maybe it'll turn on if we do something.
SIGMA: And what would "something" be?
PHI: Who knows?

[ investigate the card slots on the strange machine ]

PHI: I think you can put things into these.
PHI: There are three of them...
PHI: I think they're probably for memory cards of some sort.

[ investigate the card slots again ]

SIGMA: Hmm...
SIGMA: I wonder why they're three different colors?
PHI: Well, I imagine you're supposed to put in cards that match, right?
SIGMA: So we need three cards of three different colors.

[ investigate the safe below the strange machine ]





SIGMA: Yeah. I wonder what's inside...
PHI: Something someone wants to keep safe. What else do you put in a safe?
SIGMA: Well, what do you think it could be?
PHI: A cracker.
SIGMA: What the hell’s so important about a cracker?!
PHI: Okay... How about a tie deposit box?
SIGMA: A... A what? What does that even mean?!
PHI: Let's just try and open it.
SIGMA: How?
PHI: Well, there’s some kind of pad on the front with a three-by-three grid, right?
PHI: I'm guessing that's how you open it.
SIGMA: Right. Let's give it a shot, then.

[ sigma enters in a random pattern to see what will happen - of course, it doesn’t work ]

SIGMA: Damn… No luck.
PHI: Well, of course not.
PHI: You're not going to get far just guessing.
PHI: We need to find a clue.

[ investigating the elevator doors ]



SIGMA: I wonder if I can just force it open…



SIGMA: Damn. No good. Stupid thing won't even budge.
PHI: Trying to force it is pointless. We need to find another way out.
PHI: Hmm...

[ investigate the door again ]

PHI: Opeeeeeeen sesame!
SIGMA: Pretty sure that's not going to work...
SIGMA: Was that your "another way"?

[ investigate the elevator panel ]



SIGMA: Why'd it light up?
SIGMA: It didn't do anything earlier...
PHI: Maybe that was because the game hadn't started yet.
SIGMA: So you think this button does something?
PHI: Donno. Let's take another look at it.

[ investigate the rabbit symbol at the top ]

PHI: This is some kind of mouse icon!
SIGMA: It's a rabbit! How many times do I have to tell you?!
PHI: You think there might be some kind of connection with that Zero III guy we just saw?

[ investigate the rabbit picture again ]

PHI: Rock, paper, scissors--rock!
PHI: Heh… I won.
SIGMA: That's not scissors. That's a rabbit.

[ investigate the rabbit picture again ]

SIGMA: Hmm...
SIGMA: Zero... the third...
PHI: Isn't there something kind of odd about these buttons?
SIGMA: Uh... what?
PHI: Well, how many elevators have you seen with a "0" floor?
SIGMA: Oh yeah...
PHI: Do you think there's some kind of connection between that Zero guy and the "0" button?

[ look around the elevator ]



[ investigate the baby panel ]



PHI: Yeah, looks like it.

[ investigate the baby picture again ]

PHI: *Sigh* A baby, huh...
PHI: I wish I had one...
SIGMA: Wh-Whoa, what're you talking about?
PHI: It's just... Looking at this thing made me think about babies. I mean, it is a picture of a baby.
SIGMA: You like kids?
PHI: Yeah, I guess so.
SIGMA: There some guy you're planning on making some with?
PHI: H-Hey! No, there is not!
SIGMA: I see.
SIGMA: You wanna make one here, then?
PHI: Make one what?
SIGMA: A baby.
PHI: ...

[ Phi hits Sigma the creepy grandfather ]

SIGMA: O-Ow...
PHI: You stay away from me, all right?!
PHI: Don't even think about doing anything!
PHI: If any part of you touches me, even by accident, I will break it off! We clear?!
SIGMA: Yeah, of course... I was just joking.

[ investigating the old man panel ]



PHI: It’ s an icon that looks like an old person.
SIGMA: Hmm...

[ investigate the old man symbol again ]

PHI: You know, if you tilt your head like this, it looks like a one-eyed guy with a moustache is drooling all over--
SIGMA: No it doesn't!



[ investigating the strange poster ]

SIGMA: What do you think this means?
PHI: Hell if I know. It's just a bunch of pictures of... babies and old people.
PHI: Why don't you see if you can get it off the wall?

[ Sigma takes down the poster ]




[ going back to the old man panel ]

PHI: An old man...
PHI: Hey, Sigma.
PHI: Do you remember seeing a couple of dried up old farts in here somewhere?
SIGMA: That's not very polite. You should just call them... old men or old women or something.
PHI: Whatever. Do you remember anything?
SIGMA: Yeah, that poster...

[ investigate the old man panel again ]

PHI: Well, look at this control panel...
PHI: You think it might be connected to how many old turds there are on that poster?
SIGMA: What'd I just say?!
PHI: Fine, fine. Elderly ladies and gentlemen. Better?
SIGMA: Hrmph.

[ counting the number of old men on the poster, getting 7, and pressing the 7 button on the old man panel. then going back to investigate the baby panel ]

PHI: It’s...a baby…
PHI: Hey, have you seen a baby in here?
SIGMA: Goo-goo.
PHI: Sorry, another baby.
PHI: Stop screwing around and think.
PHI: Don't you remember seeing some babies?
SIGMA: Hmm.

[ counting the number of babies on the poster, getting 4, and keying in 4 ]

PHI: Hey, Sigma...
PHI: Did you just hear a noise?
SIGMA: What noise?



[ sigma takes the blue memory card, and they investigate it ]

PHI: That’s the memory card that came out of the control panel.
PHI: It's blue.

[ sigma goes back to the strange machine and inserts the blue memory card into the blue slot ]

SIGMA: Hey, it turned on!
PHI: Looks like this thing is working now.

[ investigate the turned-on strange machine ]

PHI: What are you doing?
PHI: There are still two open slots.
SIGMA: Yeah, I know...
SIGMA: I just need to put in more cards, right?
PHI: Exactly. Hopefully, that'll make something happen.

[ going back to investigate the metal grate underneath the elevator panel ]



PHI: All of the bolts holding it on aren't really shaped like normal bolts...
SIGMA: Yeah, that seems kind of... significant, doesn't it?
PHI: Uh huh.
SIGMA: Can you see anything in there?
PHI: Nope. Too dark.

[ investigating the red hexagonal bolt ]

PHI: That’s a bolt. It’s hexagonal. Why am I telling you this? Can’t you see it?

[ investigate the red bolt again ]

SIGMA: It's red...
PHI: Yes, it's hexagonal and red. Good work.

[ investigating the green pentagonal bolt ]

SIGMA: A bolt shaped like a pentagon.

[ investigate the green bolt again ]

PHI: Hmm... A pentagonal bolt, huh?
PHI: And it's green...

[ investigating the blue square bolt ]

SIGMA: This bolt is square…

[ investigating the blue bolt again ]

PHI: You don't see square bolts very often...
PHI: The color's not right, either... How many blue bolts have you seen?

[ investigating the yellow triangular bolt ]

PHI: A triangular bolt.

[ investigating the yellow bolt again ]

SIGMA: That's a weird shape for a bolt...
PHI: Can you get it off?
SIGMA: Just leave it to me! There's nothing I can't get off!
PHI: Ooooh, I see your angle. Nice try.
SIGMA: Angle... try... Triangle...
SIGMA: Ugh...

[ investigating the yellow bolt again ]

SIGMA: Hey, you know the term “love triangle”?
SIGMA: It just doesn't make sense to me...
SIGMA: I mean, the typical love triangle only connects at a single point, right?
SIGMA: I just think maybe they should call it a love lambda...
PHI: What? What does that have to do with this bolt?
SIGMA: Uh...nothing.
PHI: Then shut up and figure out how we're going to get these off.
SIGMA: Ugh...





SIGMA: Oh... Hey, this end is loose.
PHI: Can you take it off?
SIGMA: Let's see...

[ sigma takes off the handle and then tries to remove the green bolt with it ]
PHI: The handle you’ve got there is the same color as that bolt.
SIGMA: Yeah.
PHI: Well, okay, that's good...
PHI: But what are you planning to do with it?
SIGMA: Take the bolt off, of course.
PHI: With just the handle?
SIGMA: ...
PHI: Are you sure about this?
SIGMA: … ...

[ sigma collects the rest of the colored handles, and then goes to investigate the fire extinguisher ]



PHI: Isn't that obvious?
PHI: It's here in case there's a fire.
SIGMA: Whoa, you're saying there's some sort of thing in here that'll start a fire?
PHI: It's not out of the question.
SIGMA: C'mon, don't do that. I won't be able to do anything if I think there's something in here that'll set us on fire.

[ investigate the fire extinguisher again ]

SIGMA: You never really get to use fire extinguishers much, do you?
PHI: I guess, but do you really want to be in a situation where you have to?
SIGMA: Hm… Yeah, I guess you’re right. Only you can prevent forest fires!

[ investigate the poster of fire extinguisher directions ]



PHI: Yeah, but what it actually says seems... weird.
SIGMA: Yeah...

[ investigate the directions again ]

PHI: Hey, doesn’t this explain how to open the fire extinguisher case?
SIGMA: Really?
PHI: Yeah.
PHI: I'm pretty sure it's saying something like...
PHI: "Pull out the fire extinguisher pin and put it into the keyhole."

[ sigma listens to phi and pulls the pin from the fire extinguisher, before examining the fire extinguisher case. ]

PHI: This looks like a case for a fire extinguisher. Let me see if I can open it.
PHI: Damn. No good.
SIGMA: Is it locked?
PHI: Looks that way, yeah.
SIGMA: … …
PHI: Wait… Sigma, I think you might have what we need to open this.
SIGMA: You mean this pin from the fire extinguisher?
PHI: Yeah.
PHI: I think it might fit in that keyhole…
PHI: C’mon, give it a try.
SIGMA: Sure.

[ sigma sticks the pin in the keyhole and unlocks the case ]

PHI: Hm. Looks like it worked.
SIGMA: Excellent.
PHI: Okay, time to see what's inside…

[ open the fire extinguisher case to see what’s inside ]



SIGMA: Polyurethane packaging...?
PHI: There are a few pieces of metal in here.
PHI: Four of them... They look like sockets for socket wrenches.
SIGMA: Each one has a different shape, though.
PHI: Yeah.
SIGMA: Well, we might as well take them.

[ sigma takes the sockets and combines each one with the proper handle ]



[ sigma attempts to use the red socket wrench on the green bolt ]

PHI: Are you blind?
PHI: You can't get that bolt off with that wrench.
PHI: The handle's a totally different color, and the socket's--
SIGMA: I know, I know!
SIGMA: Man, you make one little mistake...

[ sigma then uses the correct wrenches to remove the red and green bolts ]

SIGMA: Excellent! That’s the red bolt gone!
SIGMA: All right! That’s the green bolt off!
PHI: Yeah, good job. You’re a regular mechanic.

[ sigma then attempts to remove the cover when it’s still partially bolted on ]

PHI: It’s still bolted on, genius.
PHI: You’re not finished.
SIGMA: What am I, your servant?

[ sigma then uses the right wrenches to remove the yellow and blue bolts ]

SIGMA: Right, so I’ve got all the bolts off now.
SIGMA: Ready? I'm gonna open it.
PHI: What're you asking me for?
SIGMA: Okay, okay, jeez...



[ sigma pulls out a box maze puzzle ]

SIGMA: What’s this?
PHI: It looks like some kind of maze.
SIGMA: Do you think we're supposed to solve this?
PHI: Probably.
SIGMA: All right! I'm on it!

[ sigma fails at solving the maze once ]

SIGMA: Arg… Damnit, this is hard.
PHI: Man, you're an idiot. I'm pretty sure that's an elementary school-level maze...
SIGMA: If it's so easy, you do it!
PHI: Can I?
SIGMA: … ...
SIGMA: ...No! I can do it! I'll show you!
PHI: *Sigh* All right, fine.

[ sigma fails again ]

SIGMA: Man, I just can’t figure this out...
PHI: You need to get the green block to the bottom there by moving the red blocks out of the way.
PHI: Sometimes, you just have to stop and backtrack, you know?
PHI: It's kinda like life.
SIGMA: Yeah, 'cause you've obviously got life all figured out...

[ sigma fails to solve the puzzle...again… ]

SIGMA: Damnit… I have no idea what I’m doing.
PHI: *Sigh* Fine, you've forced my hand.
PHI: Right, up, right, down, left, down...
PHI: You should be able to figure out the rest.
SIGMA: H-Hey, come on, why don't you just tell me the whole thing?
PHI: Oh, I don't think so. I like watching you squirm.
SIGMA: Fine, but my safe word is "stop."

[ sigma displays his amazing ability to fail at a puzzle when he’s been handed half of the answer, once again ]

SIGMA: Arg! Fucking mazes, how do they work?!
PHI: God you're hopeless. I'm gonna give you a huge, huge, huge, huge, huge hint, all right?
PHI: Right, up, right, down, left, down, right, down, left, up, left, up.
PHI: That's pretty much the whole thing.

[ five guesses how sigma’s next attempt turned out. yup, another fuck-up. ]

PHI: You have got to be kidding me.
PHI: This is seriously a kid's puzzle, you know that, right?
SIGMA: S-Sorry...
PHI: Fine. Face the box, and do exactly what I tell you to do.
PHI: If you can’t do it after this… Well, then I’ll just kill myself right now to get this ordeal over with. Ready?
SIGMA: Y-Yeah...
PHI: Right, up, right, down, left, down, right, down, left, up, left, up.
PHI: Once you've done that, it's just left, up, right. Then the green block goes to the bottom right.

[ sigma finally solves the puzzle. it’s a miracle. ]

SIGMA: Sweet! I did it!
PHI: You're pretty good.
SIGMA: Hmph. This is kid stuff. I could do it with my eyes closed.
PHI: Oh, look at this...
SIGMA: Hm?
PHI: Something came out of the box.
SIGMA: Oh yeah... Is this a... memory card?

[ taking the memory card and putting it in the green slot on the strange machine, causing the machine to turn green ]



PHI: Maybe it's some kind of password?
SIGMA: A password?
PHI: You got a notepad or something?
SIGMA: Huh? Uh, no, not really.
PHI: Then you'll just have to remember this.
PHI: You think you can handle that?
SIGMA: Y-Yeah, of course! I'm always remembering shit!

[ sigma keys the password into the safe ]



PHI: You did it! Good job!
SIGMA: Heh... Piece of cake.

[ sigma reaches in to grab what’s inside ]

SIGMA: Is this...a key?
SIGMA: Hey, it is a key! We found it!
PHI: Awesome! Now hurry up and use it!

[ they go over to the elevator panel, where there’s a locked button ]



PHI: You don't need to ask me every time you're going to do something. Just hurry it up.
SIGMA: Right, right, I know. Here goes...
PHI: Stop talking and do it.
SIGMA: ...
SIGMA: Yes! it unlocked!
PHI: Hmm. So now we just have to open this panel...

[ sigma opens the panel and goes to press the button ]

SIGMA: Are you ready?
PHI: Just do it!
SIGMA: All right, all right, message received.
SIGMA: Here we go...
SIGMA: Three...two...one...
SIGMA: And push!

[ the doors stay closed, but a hatch on the ceiling opens ]

PHI: Oh...
PHI: It opened a... hatch in the ceiling?
SIGMA: What?
SIGMA: Why does an elevator have a ceiling hatch?
PHI: … ...
SIGMA: … ...

What was learned:
→ So I guess at some point Sigma and I were trapped in an elevator and had to escape by solving puzzles?
→ ...Man, who did I piss off to get someone so useless...

Effects:
+1000 what even
+100 sigma is a moron and also a pervert